 | Category: | Movies | | Genre: | Action & Adventure |
I've always been fascinated with Vikings. I can read runes and once tried to learn Old Norse. So when I found out there was a new movie coming out with Vikings in it, I knew I'd have to watch it.
The good news: there's Vikings. The bad news: they have horns. They arrive in a gigantic boat, with horses. And a fancy sled (several, maybe). The attention to weapons was fairly good though. It's true that Vikings would have travelled more heavily armed than Indians. What isn't realistic is that the Vikings always seemed to always outnumber the Indians -- why? And I was not previously aware that the Vikings landed in British Columbia. The resulting trekking around in the mountains is very dramatic, but can't help drawing unflattering comparisons to Lord of the Rings.
Unfortunately that was just one of many plotholes here. Karl Urban stars in the movie, and if you are a person of the female persuasion who gets all hot and bothered at the thought of Karl Urban walking around with his shirt off, then this might be your thing.
OK. The story: he is along as a child on a Viking raid when some unspecified calamity befalls the ship (a fire? an attack? a storm?); he is discovered by an Indian woman who adopts him, and he is raised as one of their own. He's never quite accepted by the other Indians, who won't let him join in their Indian games.
But then one foggy night the Vikings come back and it's up to him (the movie is a bit unclear on why) to fight them all singlehanded.
If you have to ask whether he is successful, you haven't seen very many movies. There is of course also a cute Indian chick. Unfortunately, the only nudity in the movie is what I've already described -- although there was one unintentional laugh when one of the male characters walks by the camera wearing a lioncloth and shows us a little bit more than the director was probably going for.
Overall, a decent action flick. Some reviews I've read talked about all the gore; it was violent in a jerky, blurry sort of way though. I got the feeling they saved on effects by not showing any of them for more than a split second. Sure, heads got chopped off and flew or rolled away, but you can probably see more gore in a video game. It's very violent, but in almost a cartoonish sort of way.
If you've seen The Thirteenth Warrior (starring Antonio Banderas as an Arab with an inexplicable Spanish accent), then you have already seen this done better. Don't bother seeing it in the theater. The best I can say about it is that it's pretty short and it wasn't terrible.
 | jvon wrote on Apr 14, '07 Oh and the other thing about this movie that annoyed me is that all the Vikings were all kind of swarthy looking, like they came from Greece or Turkey or something. As weird as it is to imagine ferocious Danes and Swedes terrorizing people (they mostly have Lutheran pancake breakfasts these days), that's exactly what Vikings were.
The Kurgan from Highlander was the Viking warrior chief, which probably tells you everything you need to know.
|
| jvon wrote on Apr 14, '07 I've read many of the works cited at the end of that article. :)
|
 | Nope.
It's not the best movie in the world but there are some aspects that I like.
1. The color palettes. It's always dark and somber, and then some colors are highlighted, i.e. blue eyes, blood splatters.
2. The leftt eye fell out of the eye socket. HAHAHA I found it extremely cool. (because it's the only thing I can see clearly during the fightscenes)
3. How to make a low budget (seemingly) epic movie? Shoot it in a very narrow point of view. this way you don't have to use that software Peter Jackson developed for LoTR (which am sure will cost like hell) that could create a thousand warriors from a template of 5. In some cases, it makes me a bit claustrophobic. Hahah
4. And thus, it has to be seen in the big screen, otherwise you'll miss all the fuss about.
BUT. I do feel the storyline is ULTIMATELY weak. It's about Indians, right? The greatness of the ancient nation,. blah... and the hero is still: a white Viking. hahaha... So American. He's like an ancient white Rambo from Europe in the native America. They might as well make a movie about Sakagawea.
another good point: NIce arses they got in the movie.... mwahahaha |
| jvon wrote on Apr 15, '07, edited on Apr 15, '07 Yes you'd think that it would be the Indians rising up and kicking the Vikings asses, which they surely would have just out of numerical superiority, no other reason. One boat full of guys versus a whole continent: the guys on the boat lose no matter how heavily armed they are. That's why the English were successful when they came here: they came to trade. When they fought the Indians they were slaughtered (until much later).
As for the Europeans being superior militarily, of this there is no question. But the boy growing up with Indians and somehow learning how to swordfight was not realistic in the least. (Nor was him fighting about 50 guys who have done nothing but fight their whole lives.)
Another thing: he tells her that the Vikings know ice and snow better than any men alive (true enough)... so where's he lead them? Up into the mountains. Yeah, that makes sense.
The scene on the lake was completely pointless... so much of the movie was pointless.
I am guessing this will be remembered as the movie where Karl Urban walked around the whole time with his shirt off... if anyone remembers it at all.
|
| It was a movie I will remember where me and my friends found so many of its dialogue could be found in other previous-made movies...
and yes... Karl Urban can ride horses....
heh heh |
| jvon wrote on Apr 19, '07 It's pretty bad when people in Indonesia recognize a movie as being derivative of other Hollywood movies, but yes, it was, extremely. It was Lord of the Rings meets The Last of the Mohicans with a little Thirteenth Warrior thrown in. It should have gone direct to video, but I suppose they figured Karl Urban was in it, and he was in that movie with the hobbits, so maybe it'll make some money.
It probably worked, too. (I haven't looked at the sales numbers.)
|
|
Platinum Account
Enjoy my site?
Give to Spirit of America
|
The Thirteenth Warrior (starring Antonio Banderas as an Arab with an inexplicable Spanish accent), then you have already seen this done better 
